From the moment a cruise ship sets sail, the front desk becomes a stage for some of the most unexpected, hilarious, and downright unbelievable questions from guests—proof that life at sea comes with its own brand of comedy.
“Does the crew get off when we stop at night?”
“If the ship sinks, do we get a refund?”
“Can you turn down the waves? They’re making me seasick.”
“Is the Wi-Fi signal stronger at sea level?”
“Do these life jackets come in different colors to match my outfit?”
“Can I reserve a deck chair for the whole cruise?”
“What time do we sail past the Eiffel Tower?” (on a Caribbean cruise…)
“Will the ship wait for me if I’m late coming back from port?”
“Does the casino take seashells as payment?”
“How do you keep the islands from floating away while we visit?”
“What do you do with the old water when you refill the pool?”
“Can I borrow the captain’s binoculars to look into my neighbor’s cabin?”
“Do whales bump into the ship at night?”
“Can I get air miles for sailing?”
“Why is the sea salty if the ship has a desalination plant?”
“When we cross the equator, will the toilets flush the other way?”
“If I fall overboard, can I call the front desk for help?”
“Are the crew trained to speak dolphin?”
“Can I drive the ship if the captain is busy?”
“Do the anchors reach the bottom of the ocean?”
“Does the crew have their own pool, or do you swim in the guest one at night?”
“Is there an app to check where the seagulls are?”
“Can you turn the ship so my balcony faces the sunset every evening?”
“What happens if the ship runs out of ocean?”
“Do I need my passport to get off at the private island, since it’s private?”
“Are the shows in the theater live, or is the ship streaming them from Broadway?”
“Does the captain steer the ship manually, or is it like a Roomba?”
“Can you stop the rain until I finish my cocktail?”
